Okay, I’ll admit it. I love watching American Idol, and I’ve watched it since Season One. I don’t watch the crappy contest part of it, though. I like watching the part where the painfully bad singers audition. As soon as auditions are over, I stop watching.
I have a question. What the hell makes some of these people think they can sing? Seriously, I don’t get it. Did they not record themselves and play it back before auditioning, to make sure their mommy wasn’t lying to them about their singing ability? Are there that many cruel people in the world, who would intentionally set a coworker up for humiliation on national television? Do they think drunks at a karaoke bar are good judges of singing talent? Or are some of these people just plain not for real?
I don’t have the answers, but I do have the videos so you can judge for yourself.
First, let’s meet Brenna Kyner as she sings “Under Pressure” by Queen. Oh …. my ….. God. She claims to have ten years of training and a degree in vocal performance, believe it or not. I think somebody laughed all the way to the bank with Brenna’s money.
Then we have Eric Chapman, a hairdresser who thinks he sings like Taylor Hicks just because some people think he looks like Taylor Hicks (the guy who won last year, and who in my opinion majorly sucks). One of the judges asks him if he’s drunk, and Eric gets escorted out by security when he tries to fix one of the judges’ hair.
A lot of people have said my significant other looks like Bo Bice, the American Idol second-place winner from year before last (which I take as a compliment, since Bo’s a hottie), but that certainly doesn’t mean they sing even remotely alike. LOL
Stephen Thoen is just scary. Not only his singing is scary (he does “Bohemian Rhapsody” by Queen), but he is just plain all-around scary. I can picture him picking people off with an automatic weapon from a watchtower, because he didn’t make it onto American Idol. Eeeek!
16-year-old Jason Anderson is not just a bad singer, and a crappy juggler, and a terrible dancer ….. he has apparently been convinced by his family that he’s destined to be a famous. He has a major meltdown when he’s rejected, and his family should have their asses kicked for lying to a kid.
At any rate, he’s famous now, but for being an untalented spoiled brat.
This one is so bad that I’m almost at a loss for words. They bring her equally creepy mom into the audition room. Darwin Reedy sings “Dontcha” by the Pussycat Dolls, which is hilarious given her appearance and the lyrics. I can’t help but wonder about this one, given her name, ROFLMAO.
Poor Tashawn Moore can probably sing okay, but she can’t remember the words or the tune to her chosen audition song, “Kiss” by Prince.
Poor Nicholas Zitzmann. He’s a socially awkward software engineer, and according to the pre-audition interview, his coworkers convinced him he could win American Idol. He sings “Unchained Melody” by The Righteous Brothers. One of the judges describes it as “almost non-human”, if that gives you an idea.
I have a feeling Nicholas’s coworkers are laughing their asses off.
The second week was equally interesting, and equally weird. Meet Sammy Neighbors, a college student who Simon Cowell described as “Sylvester Stallone’s younger sister singing Paula Abdul”.
This guy’s idiocy is indescribable. Meet Ian Benardo …. failed dancer, failed singer, failed ….. oh hell, he admits he has two therapists, LOL.
That’s a pretty good representation of American Idol auditions rejected thus far for this season. When I first started watching the show, I thought the judges were unnecessarily nasty. Now, though, I’m not so sure. If they are getting literally tens of thousands of delusional people in auditions, I don’t blame them for losing their patience (and even occasionally losing their tempers).
Well, except for one case. There was a guy on this year who wasn’t really a bad singer, so they could have just told him he wasn’t right for the competition, and left it at that. However, Simon Cowell said that he couldn’t be an American Idol because he looks “odd”, then went on to say the guy looked like a “bush baby”. Based on the guy’s appearance, I’d guess he has fetal alcohol syndrome; and either way, there’s hardly anything one can do about the appearance of one’s eyes. There was just no reason to say something that cruel to him, and there was definitely no reason to show that interaction on national television. I’d give the judges and the producers hell for it, but the mainstream media jumped on that one pretty quickly so I see no need to beat a dead horse.
The auditions continue, so I guess I’ll at least have something to amuse me, especially since one of the judges (Paula Abdul) seems to be on something this season. LOL
I have to hand it to you… LOL! I love American Idol auditions! They are the butter for my toast! I think I had some taped from season 3… and I just pop that tape in when I’m in the mood for a good laugh. Unfortunately, my vcr is dying.
I guess I’ll just have to watch it later this month when a new set of people audition.
I think it’s sad. Eventually, I think it’ll come down to someone killing themselves because they were rejected.. and the media will blame American Idol for being so “mean” to the contestant. Then comes the lawsuits… etc.
My advice to people who want to be stars and think they can sing.. please record yourself first and watch it. I’ve had myself recorded before at one of those amusement park faux recording studios… and it was hilarious when we played it back… I can’t sing… I know this. It was just fun. But you don’t see me going around trying to sing like a Pussycat Doll. Heck no! At least I got some sense of myself.
Recording oneself and playing it back is great advice to anyone thinking of auditioning on American Idol, in my opinion. My son is a musician (not the AI type, he plays rock music), and that’s how he works out his songs.
I’m very much looking forward to the new season of AI, with the new rejects. I have heard that this is supposed to be the best season ever. I guess time will tell.
I do also fear that someone will eventually commit self-harm after they are rejected, based on some of the auditions I have seen, and it will be blamed on the show. It’s not the show’s fault if these people are delusional, though. If anything, their friends and family should have been honest with them before they ended up at an American Idol audition with the mindset that they will win.
That’s the logical reasoning.. but come on, we’re talking about America here.
I sometimes wonder if they are just bad on purpose so they get picked to be on the show… even if for the 30 seconds of fame.
Of course the ones that hurt the most are the ones that really think they can sing… I think listening to themselves first should be a prerequisite to auditioning. LOL