Kasey Kazee of Ashland, Kentucky tried to hold up a liquor store, with duct tape wrapped around his face as a disguise. (Wouldn’t masking tape work better for that purpose? Sorry, couldn’t resist.)
The store manager had some duct tape of his own, though, wrapped around a club he kept in the store for just this sort of occasion. He chased Kazee outside, and an employee held the would-be bandit in a neckhold until police arrived. EMTs removed the tape, though there doesn’t seem to be any footage of that process, unfortunately; apparently Kazee got lucky because he had been sweating so much that the tape didn’t stick well. Not surprisingly, he was quickly nicknamed “The Duct Tape Bandit”.
Hilarity ensued when, in an interview from the jail with a local television station, a very animated Kazee proclaimed “I’m not no Duct Tape Bandit”. This, you have to see to believe.
Not at all surprisingly, folks on YouTube have been having a ball. Some of them do reenactments. Another made a photoshop overlay proving that Kazee is indeed the Duct Tape Bandit (as if there was ever really a question about it) to the tune of “Photograph” by Nickelback (”look at this photograph, everytime I do it makes me laugh, how did our eyes get so red, and what the hell is on Joey’s head?”). Someone else made a fake news story about a copycat robber who wrapped his head in invisible scotch tape. One even made a very funny rap song using actual media interviews about the case, which can be heard and downloaded on zShare.
Most interestingly for our purposes, though, is that some people who actually live in Kentucky have said it won’t be long before the state enacts a law requiring a five-day waiting period and a background check for the purchase of duct tape. Also interesting is that, in a state where many are avid hunters, the store manager didn’t have a shotgun behind the counter instead of a club. Kasey Kazee really needs to be thankful he’s still alive.
So, what will happen to the Duct Tape Bandit? He faces 20 to life for robbery, and the judge and jury is likely to be unmoved though amused by his claim that they have the wrong man, given that he was caught on the scene with the duct tape still on his face. I smell an insanity defense.
Yes, that’s right — because a good insanity defense needs preparation before the act for it to be believable.
Fellow didn’t go out and try to mother a few ducks in a pond a few days before this, did he? (Preferably plastic ducks…)
If he did, would that mean he’s a motherducker? ROFL
I need t.p. for my bunghole.
Sorry, couldn’t resist.
Heh he. Heh.
Huh huh. Huh.
Heh heh. Yeah. Heh heh.
I like when he pointed to himself and said “this is not me.”
Well I don’t think I’d want to be him either, if you get my meaning.
[...] Still, this ass clown is miles away in weirdness from the most comical criminal disguise ever. That prize goes to the Duct Tape Bandit, who quite coincidentally was from a nearby area (Ashland, Kentucky). For anyone who missed it, you can read about the Duct Tape Bandit on my blog here. [...]
[...] Still, this ass clown is miles away in weirdness from the most comical criminal disguise ever. That prize goes to the Duct Tape Bandit, who quite coincidentally was from a nearby area (Ashland, Kentucky). For anyone who missed it, you can read about the Duct Tape Bandit on my blog here. [...]
[...] February 29, 2008 by elfninosmom After reading the arguments against and for self-described “Millionaire Republican“, infomercial scamdicapping pseudo-libertarian presidential candidate Wayne Allyn Root, I have appointed Root as the new King of Frickintardistan, a highly revered position previously held by last year’s self-described “front-running LP presidential candidate” Gene Chapman, and thus replacing our current King, the Duct Tape Bandit. [...]
[...] eastern Kentucky, home of one of this blog’s all-time favorite criminals, the Duct Tape Bandit. LOL. That probably answers my original question in this [...]
[...] he didn’t know he’d run over someone. Other examples of pure weirdness include the Duct Tape Bandit, the Skid Mark Bandit, the woman who thought a child’s crazy straw was shaped like a male [...]
[...] eastern Kentucky, home of one of this blog’s all-time favorite criminals, the Duct Tape Bandit. LOL. That probably answers my original question in this [...]
[...] eastern Kentucky, home of one of this blog’s all-time favorite criminals, the Duct Tape Bandit. LOL. That probably answers my original question in this [...]
[...] 3, 2008 by elfninosmom I previously wrote about the Duct Tape Bandit – by far, one of the most amusing criminals ever – and have an update. (I still think he should [...]