Liveblogging American Idol
April 2, 2008 by ElfNinosMom
It’s Dolly Parton night. While most people would assume that I’d be unhappy with that, since I’m an Alice In Chains / Grand Funk Railroad kinda gal, they’d be wrong. I grew up listening to Dolly Parton on my grandfather’s ever-present handheld transistor radio on the porch, and I think she’s a wonderful artist.
Dammit, I’m showing my age again.
Doesn’t Dolly look absolutely fantastic? My goodness, she’s 62 years old according to Wikipedia! She either had a lot of cosmetic surgery, or she’s a vampire who maintains her youth by drinking the blood of virgins. Either way, she looks younger than me, and I’m only 45. Gee, now I made myself feel ugly. Thanks, self. Now I guess it’s back to the Lancome counter so I feel un-ugly again.
Brooke White (Jolene) - She’s just so damn cute, she could charm a snake. I really like this song, but I’m not sure about how she’s doing it. She’s going WAY too fast at times, it’s almost as if she’s in a hurry to get to the next line, but in the process she leaves the music behind. Cool song though, I think I said that already …. “Jolene Jolene Jolene Jolene, I’m beggin’ of ya, please don’t take my man. Jolene Jolene Jolene Jolene please don’t take him just because you can” …. that’s good stuff, timeless. It’s definitely a country song through and through, in my opinion, so I’m not sure how well it works as a folksy song, but she’s just so damn cute, I’m going to like it anyway. LOL. Randy thought it was okay, Paula liked it, Simon didn’t like it. It seems like that’s almost always the way the judges vote, isn’t it?
David Cook (Little Sparrow) - First I have to ask who he stole his arrangement from this time. Yeah, I know, that’s not nice. But last week he did a cool and very different arrangement, then it turned out that he got the arrangement from Chris Cornell. Now, I don’t trust him, which is probably dumb, but still. It doesn’t change the fact that I’m now suspicious of whether it’s his own talent, or if he’s just borrowing others’ arrangements. It’s alright, I guess, but not great because I’m used to hearing the original, plus his breasteses aren’t big enough for him to be Dolly. Then again, even Anna Nicole didn’t have big enough breasteses to be Dolly. Randy loved it, Paula loved it, Simon thought it wasn’t as good as last week but that if a guy can do a song about a sparrow and make it sound good like he did, more power to him. I agree.
Ramiele Malubay (Do I Ever Cross Your Mind) - Ramiele is cute as always, but my goodness. I could hear people from church choirs singing this just as well. So far, I think she’s going to be gone next week, because this is so forgettable that I’ve forgotten it already. Who was singing this again? LOL, yeah, I know, that’s not nice. But she’s cute and she has a big voice, but she just didn’t pull this one off, it wasn’t very good. She was so forgettable that people will forget to vote for her. They may not even remember she was on the show. She sang it better than I could do, but that’s not necessarily saying anything since I couldn’t carry a tune in a spit bucket. Randy gave it 6.5 out of ten, Paula thought it was okay, Simon thought it was cute but that’s all. She needs to fix her hair differently, at least then she’d be memorable for something.
Jason Castro (Travelin’ Through) - Dolly thought he was funky looking and just kind of cool, so she thinks it’s a good song for him. Uh-oh, my toe is tappin’. It’s a good song for him. He’s playing guitar. He got some work done on the dreads, which he really needed. Dreads are really just intentionally matted hair, did you know that? I looked it up when Elf wanted dreads, and that’s why I wouldn’t let him do it. No child o’ mine is going to walk around with their hair all matted and nasty looking. Well, maybe it wasn’t as good as I thought, since despite the toe-tappin’, I just didn’t like it enough to not ramble on about something completely unrelated. Randy liked it, Paula liked it and liked his confidence, and Simon didn’t like it, he thought it sounded like the same song as before, it doesn’t suit him, and said he’s lost his season pass to Dollywood for saying so, LOL.
Carly Smithson (Here You Come Again) - It’s just her on the stage, with a guy sitting and playing guitar. She slowed the song into a ballad. I’m confused, and not just because she turned an upbeat little ditty into a ballad; I’m wondering what the hell she is wearing. Is it super-tight pants with a long shirt, or is it a mini skirt short enough to show her bum? I can’t figure it out. The song works okay as a ballad. I still hate Carly though, because I still think she’s a plant. I don’t mean that I hate her like I’d want her to contract the Ebola Virus or anything, but I do wish she’d get voted off. Randy thought it would be the best song of the night. Paula loved it, but she loves everything so who cares what she thinks. Paula and Randy argued about her performance from last week, as if anyone cares. Simon thought it was good but not great. He told her to talk to whoever is dressing her. Obviously, I’d agree.
David Archuletta (Smoky Mountain Memories) - Dolly loves him, she almost cried but has to keep her false eyelashes in place, she thinks he has wat it takes to be a great singer. The kid has a great voice, I admit. It’s weird that he sings “my southern eyes are teary” without any accent whatsoever, though. Cilla told me last week on “Live From Court Street” that this kid’s dad is a real monster, yelled at the kid in rehearsals until he was in tears. To hell with his dad. No parent should ever treat their kid like that, to hell with him. All the judges loved it, and I liked it okay. I like him better now that I know that his dad is a bully. Still, he seems more Broadway to me. I can’t see him having a successful pop music career. He really needs to sing something other than ballads, because otherwise I’m going to assume he has no range of musical styles.
Kristy Lee Cook (Coat of Many Colors) - I know this song, used to listen to it growing up. Kristy Lee has a nice voice for country music, but Dolly she ain’t. It’s a beautiful song though, especially for those like me who grew up poor as dirt. I can relate to it. Uh-oh, both feet are tapping. I’m not sure if it’s because she’s doing a good job, or because it’s a song I like. She’s just super cute, looks like she just stepped off the cover of “Seventeen”. The outfit didn’t match the song, though. She was dressed in a flowing dress which wasn’t very colorful at all. Randy said this is “Kristy Lee Week”, Paula said she looks stunning and gave a beautiful performance, Simon thought last week was better, and this week was pleasant but forgettable. Ryan points out that she’s barefoot and has a French pedicure.
Syesha Mercado (I Will Always Love You) - Absolutely fantastic song, I love this one. Whitney Houston did a good job with it too. During the first “I” before I love you, she could have done much more with it. Then she picked it up with “I wish you joy” though. Then she nailed the second “I will always love you”. I’m impressed, this girl can hold a note! WOW. Fantastic, best of the night without any doubt, her best ever. Wow, I got goosebumps. Randy and Paula loved it, Simon thought the first part was good but thought the second part paled in comparison to Whitney, so he wishes she hadn’t sang it. I disagree with Simon, though I usually agree with him. Sure, she’s not Whitney, but she still kicked that song’s ass.
Michael Johns (It’s All Wrong, But It’s Alright) - Dolly likes him, would like to write some songs for him. He’s a very good singer, he’s turning this into white soul, and it works. it reminds me of something you’d hear from Hall and Oates, though I’m not sure if he could hit those really high notes that Daryl Hall hits. Speaking of which, they should have a Hall and Oates week. Anyhoo …. Impressive. He’s a good looking guy too, which doesn’t hurt at all. I think he could be a very good singer, maybe even a big star one day if he plays his cards right. Randy thought it was blazing hot, Paula said you’re a star, blah blah blah (She says the same things so many times, just insert typical Paula “you are a star” comments for the blah blah blah). Simon said this was the best he has ever heard him sing.
I think Ramiele is going home tomorrow night. I also think that if not for his fan base, Jason Castro might be going home tomorrow. I just hope Carly the Plant is in the bottom three again, simply because she’s so struck on herself, and thinks she can sing much better than she really can).
